Alcohol Makes The World a More Interesting Place To Be! By Bill DeFer - June 5, 2014 Share on Facebook Tweet on Twitter by Robert Piche on June 5, 2014 Alcohol doesn’t make the world go ‘round, but sometimes it makes it spin a bit faster! I’m not an alcoholic. Alcoholics go to meetings. I am drunk and drunk’s go to parties! I am a recovering alcoholic. Or as my wife calls it “hungover”. How do know when a man is planning for his future? He buys 2 cases instead of 1! You are not drunk if you can lie on the floor and not hold on! I got so drunk one time I woke up in a bottle chalk outline! I only drink 2x a year. On my birthday, and when it’s not my birthday! What is a drunk mans idea of a balanced diet? A beer in each hand! Swearing off booze is easy. I’ve done it thousands of times. The cost of living just went up another dollar a fifth! Studies show breast implants cause nausea and dizziness-from all the free drinks! My wife drove me to drink and I have yet to say thank you! I don’t drink all the time. Sometimes I sleep! My boyfriend told me I don’t need to drink to make myself more fun, I told him I don’t I drink to make you more fun! You might be a redneck if you’re ever too drunk to fish!